03 ♥ text / spam

[synchronous]

[ text ]

Everything appears normal to me. Nobody's sprouted an extra head or started talking in tongues, right?


[ spam ]

[ Dirk may be somewhat of a hikikomori most of the time, but he can't stay in his room 24/7. This afternoon he just sort of casually pokes his head into the cybernetic maintenance facility, curious about what exactly is in here.

He can also be found walking through the halls on his way there, on his way back to his room, and later on in the dining hall, for anyone who may want to bother him and/or take advantage of the fact that he is totally affected by this flood. ]

Comments

[mistconduct]

I dunno, man. I'm the most normal guy there is. Nothing I can see going on. You think the Admiral's fucked in the head?

[synchronous]

Man, I've thought that since the day I arrived.

Unless thinking nothing is wrong is part of the flood.

[mistconduct]

Fucking floods. Just what I wanted to do today, play mystery Guess What's Fucked.

Any ideas?

[synchronous]

A few, but nothing concrete. I've compared my current state with that of my past self in earlier transmissions on this network, and there don't seem to be any physical or mental differences that I would notice. Then again, I could be one of the lucky few who's just not affected by whatever this is.

Maybe it's just something that made everyone over the age of thirty grow an extra half-inch of hair. I doubt we'd be so lucky, though.

You got any thoughts?

[mistconduct]

Mostly that you are a fucking nerd.

[Hang on.]

Oh, you mean about the flood? No, not really. Sorry, man.

[bothfoulandfair]

I don't think so. But sometimes it takes people a while to realize that anything's changed.

[synchronous]

It's entirely possible we'll figure it out at an extremely disadvantageous moment.

[bothfoulandfair]

Probably.

[synchronous]

You noticed anything out of the ordinary today?

[bothfoulandfair]

Not really. [Except, you know.] I'm assuming you mean besides the usual.

Do you feel any different?

text too lazy to html

[heavenlymisandrist]

I have not been speaking in tongues.

same lol

[synchronous]

Well, that's fortunate.

[heavenlymisandrist]

It would appear that honesty is a component in this flood.

[ Since that was what he was actually asking about and all. ]

[synchronous]

Yeah, that does seem to be it according to this other douchebag I was talking to.

[heavenlymisandrist]

Douchebag?

[ which one? ]

audio

[this_corrosion]

I haven't.

Why's it always typed out? If I wanted to read I'd get a book.

[Still drunk? Still drunk.]

text

[synchronous]

Because I'm insecure around other people. The textual medium shields me from them on some level.

[ Why did he think getting back on the communicator would be a good idea. Oh right, because he thought it couldn't possibly be too bad if he only checked for replies to the post he made. Nice fucking job, Dirk. ]

audio

[this_corrosion]

Well, fuck em. You don't need their judgement.

[He's making a rude gesture here, but all that comes through the audio is the accompanying raspberry.]

text

[synchronous]

Hey, man, you're the one who asked.

audio

[this_corrosion]

I know! I'm trying to be fucking supportive, or something.

spam

[fearmonger]

[ Hey, Dirk. Caliborn has been looking for you.

The moment it was obvious that this was a truth flood, Caliborn decided it was best to not shit around on the network. Just in case. Not that he has anything to hide. Nothing worthy of shame, anyways-- old cagey habits die hard. And it's not as if he's actually AFFECTED either, though he completely is. Whatever.

The point is that he's totally been looking around for someone very specific. Someone who is 100% Dirk. And the target has finally been fucking sighted. His metal leg clangs against the floor as he rushes up like a dumbass along the coverless hallway. He's very aware that Dirk hasn't seen him in person yet, and is hoping to spook him even if it's only a little bit.

Once in earshot: ]

Hey. Hey. Dirk.

Strider.

Hey.

What's up.

[synchronous]

[ Dirk is limiting his network access during this flood, but he's not about to hide out in his room all day. So he's heading out of the dining hall just now, munching on a piece of fruit, when he hears a metallic clanging against the floor.

He frowns. Turns to see who's there. And shows absolutely no signs of recognition -- until the cherub speaks, that is.

He sighs. He might have to answer questions truthfully, but no one ever said he couldn't be a little shit about it. ]

That way. [ He points. Up. ] What do you want?

[fearmonger]

[ Caliborn laughs, glad to have gotten a look of recognition. No shock or horror, but that's okay. Dirk is being literal with his question, but that's also okay. ]

Everything. But mostly. At this point in time. To bother the SHIT out of you.

Remember. You are totally at my mercy. Or lack thereof. I am going to ask SO many invasive questions. Strider. Are you ready. I didn't mean directionwise. So. Let me rephrase. For your dumb ass human ears??

What are you doing. How are you feeling. What's up dog.

[synchronous]

[ Jesus he is not happy about this. ]

I'm eating. [ He takes another bite, and says with his mouth full, ] Feeling pretty irritated right now.

[ ...except. ] Are you affected by this truth shit too?

[fearmonger]

[ Cue Caliborn-provided laughtrack. ]

I don't know if I am. I don't THINK so. But. Hey. Not like I have anything to hide anymore. What with. My sister being soooo dead.

P.S.: That shit is disgusting. Don't eat it. Get yourself. Some kind of meat?? Let's go back to the food troughs. And I'll show you what fine dining actually is.

[ He proceeds to grab Dirk firmly by the arm and to attempt to drag him the opposite direction. ]